Oldies

More old stuff, found this on my other HDD. Might’ve deemed this unpublishable at one point but tonight I feel like it’s literary genius.

Ballad of A Loved One

Are we just sliding through this world alone?

If no one told you, would you still call this home?
I’m not complacent, you could say that I’m trying
But I’m far too sick of this backhanded
lying.
I’m prepared to take the heat
Be it, say it, whatever you are
And I’m prepared to take this alone, sir
I’m not afraid to find out who you are.

Because discovering me
will mean discovering you
And in discovering you I will find out what’s true
And what’s not. I need to know.
Can you keep yourself when I’ve gone insane?
Can you hang on to me
Even when I might cause you pain?
I hope, for sakes, you want to say yes
Even if the answer must be “I don’t know.”
I’m holding in my heart one truth, one place
It’s the outline of you that I call home.

Beginning of the End

I blamed myself for so long
Told myself to just go on
Even though I was the one inadequate
I told myself to take what I got
Everyone else is perfect, and I’m not
So who am I to complain, or request more?
But the truth is I am perfect
As perfect as anyone else
And it’s my right and in fact my DUTY to ask for more
I demand a better lifestyle
Some happiness, if you can’t give it to me
Then I demand someone who will
I’m tired of holding my breath waiting for the change
I’ve cried so much and now, it’s time things don’t stay the same
It’s the end or the beginning, only time can tell which.


Love You

I love everything about you.
Although you’re probably well aware–
I love the smell of your shampoo.
I love playing with your hair.
I love eating out at night,
And when there’s nowhere else to go
We can sleep in your car
No no one has to know.
Because no one else can feel
How I feel about you
So no one else can understand
What you do to pull me through.
It’s not just the nights
That I spend in your arms,
(Although a little bit of that
Never did me any harm.)
And it’s not just the places that we go
Because there’s no sights left to see
When I’m looking at you,
And you’re looking at me
It’s simply I’m in love
I have a smile on my face
I’ve found someone special
Who’s impossible to replace.
Recluse
We look at them and we say
“what are you running from?”
And they ask us,
“What are you hiding from?”
Each side a different piece of the puzzle
Neither ever correct
Or wrong
Waiting
I need some money
I need a job
Scholarships are pending
Like an angry mob
And graduation
can’t come soon enough
not with AP testing
Boy that’s gonna be tough
But the hardest part is waiting
two more months at least
until graduation
and then summer becomes the beast
it’ll be filled with work
and three more months of waiting
every moment i’m making money
i’ll be silently hating
because it’s one more useless stop
on the long, drawn out road
they tell me eventually brings me
to my own, independent abode.
It’s not too soon to start dreaming
but it sure does make it tough
when school’s not even over
and the waiting is rough.